periodic fable

Periodic fable

The heaviest known element was recently discovered by physicist at Yale’s research center. Tentatively called ‘Administratium’ at the moment, it has no protons or electrons and thus an atomic number of 0. But it does have one neutron, 125 assistant neutrons, 75 vice-neutrons, and 11 assistant vice-neutrons. These add up to an atomic mass of 312;particles cohere in the nucleus through a force that involves a continuous exchange of meson-like particles, ‘moron’.
Lacking electrons, administratium is completly inert, but it does have a chemical signature: detection is really very much straightforward as it impedes every reaction it comes in contact with. The physicist say a minute amount of adminstratium caused a reaction to take over four days to end finally although, normally less than a second would have sufficed. Neither does it decay over its normal life of three years; it undergoes a reorganization in which assistant-neutrons, vice-neutrons exchange places and the atomic weight usually increases thereafter. Research also indicates that adminstratium occurs quite naturally in the atmosphere. Typically, the concentration occurs at nodal points like government agencies, large corporations, universities and hospitals, etc.
Scientists caution that adminstratium is toxic at any level of concentration and will easily destroy other more productive reactions in its vicinity. Attempts are on to see how to rein in adminstratium and prevent irreversible damage, but till date the results are not very promising. Researchers are trying hard to find a solution though. But Adminstratium seems to be well established so it will take time to weed out. We will keep you posted. Watch this space for more.